On the Joy of Conversation

for the yappers, like me.

“Our Last Summer in Brooklyn” by PQ Kim

My friend Timi and I do this thing sometimes where we sit down and pretend to be other people, living in a different world, talking to each other. Sometimes, she’s a woman that I am trying and failing to flirt with, and other times, we are two friends trading matrimonial woes. These exchanges may last for as long as thirty minutes, hilarious conjectures thrown back and forth (she confides in me regarding her cheating husband, whom she is about to divorce, and I tell her about mine, who is slowly forgetting his name) but they amuse us greatly and I have come to find that I particularly adore how our eyes glint with glee, as we think of the next hilarious thing to say; that little intermittent pause before laughter that gets in the way of our banter.

It’s precious.

Talking is important. For one, it is tied to our survival instincts, which may explain why most kidnappers gag their victims, to prevent the miracle of speech. Making sounds with the mouth is how babies learn to communicate their hunger and glee, and how, as we grow up, we’re able to form and explore our identities within our world. We give presentations in school, confess our feelings, express disapproval at the hairdressers’, announce engagements, break bad news, and say I Do. When you think about it, the world is a museum of things uttered between people.

You meet a new person and talking becomes the string that pulls you together. You start with the little things: “What’s your name?” “Where are you from?” “What did you study in school?” And the more you know, the more you pull the string closer: “Where does it hurt” “Who made you believe that?” “What do you think of before you sleep at night?” Then one day you look at them and realize that you have traversed entire spacelands and your anxious beating heart has finally found a place to call home.

Sometimes I bump into people who believe conversations need to have a destination. They believe there has to be a why for asking questions, a reason for small talk. But typically, I enjoy them for the sake of. It’s beautiful to unravel layers of the self, slowly, a playful tease unveiling the swell of a breast, and to wonder, how much is enough? How much do you want to know? Finding the right person to converse with sometimes feels like a dance, and the more we exchange our thoughts, feelings, and ideas, the more we allow ourselves to feel. 

So try not to listen to the self-proclaimed experts who preach doom. Not everyone is out to get you and your little secrets. They tell you that the country is dying and that speaking on the phone for three hours is not the best use of your time. And to that, I remember that every single time I have visited my friend Mo’s house, and we have sat down to discuss our joint existential crises, the joy of living, the different books we’re reading, and the films we love, I have felt glorious on my way back home, knowing fully well that I have shared the little, intricate details of my life with someone that means the world to me.

I think talking will heal us all. The serious conversations, and the ones that lead nowhere. So call a friend today, someone you really love, and just talk. 

---

Media I Consumed This Week

For some reason, I am very giddy to share the things I consumed this week, because I have consumed A LOT, and I have been dying to share it with you guys. So let’s dive in!

Things I Have Seen

1. I watched Poor Things (dir. Yorgos Lanthinos) and it was very disturbing, but profound watch, so I don’t know if I should recommend it to you guys. Sha, please don’t watch it. Or do. You’re the captain of your own boat. But I must say that when I finished it, I felt something strange in my chest. It did what movies are meant to do to you.

2. I also saw When Harry Met Sally… and I found it beautiful. I love realistic love timelines, and these two eediots took a decade to realize they wanted each other. I also liked how it addressed adult loneliness and friendship with the opposite sex. A really good movie.

3. I watched DUNE 2. OOOOF. No words. Cinematic Excellence!

4. Saw The Dreamers last night and apart from the fact that I think young adult Louis Garrel had the most beautiful eyes, the movie was just decadent and French. Kept waiting for the overarching idea and never found it. It reminded me of life, you know? Everything happens and then nothing. Anyways, you can skip this one.

5. Watched Lala Land and I wish more people talked about it when they discussed movie romances. I think this is one of the best love stories I’ve ever seen. I don’t want to spoil anything about it, because I highly recommend it.

6. I watched an Anime with friends on Sunday called A Sign of Affection and OMG IT IS SO CUTE. SO CUTE. I didn’t know what to do with how cute it was. I was not familiar with its cuteness game.

I have watched a lot more things this week, but I think this list is extensive enough. Happy watching, guys!

Things I Have Read

1. The most beautiful thing I read this week was this piece by my friend, Banke. She just turned 23 and she shared what that experience has felt like. I thought it felt like rubbing alcohol on an open wound, or eating an oyster without salt and lime. It was so alive and real.

2. I have been reading poetry. Derek Walcott, Philip Larkin, Seamus Heaney, Elizabeth Bishop. Realised that I have only had time to read academic work or self-development pieces so I am trying to remedy that by returning to my roots.

Things I Have Listened To

I have been listening to my “Oontz Oontz” playlist on repeat. In my house/electronica music era, it seems.

That’s it folks!

---

A/N: I really missed you guys, I hope you are well. Next week, we will be publishing a guest post for the first time! How exciting is that? Please look forward to it. Have an amazing long weekend!